Ladonia Herald issue 58, January 2003

58th issue, January 2003

Santa Claus in Reservate

The real Santa in reservate

We have caught Santa Claus or that person or creature that goes under that name. He is now brought into the reserve in Ladonia in Hartmanburg, where Minister James Hartman has taken this picture of him. Also in the reservate is an example of alien visitors. These two elements fit well together as representing The Other. “Santa Claus” is just a way to rewrite the rather evil “Father Christmas”. Actually it is not at all about that. The real thing here is the elf or the local name the “tomte”. While this elf is satisfied with mixing himself with animals, and certainly not in a decent way, the “Santa Claus” is hidden under the name taken from Saint Nikolaus. We would like to warn you. Why is this red, fat, elderly man so interested in and generous towards children? One could easily think that all the gifts at this time of the year are given away in a most friendly gesture. Do you think we have a free lunch in this? Scientists say that the only free lunch is the Universe as a whole. Should we find one more? Do you really believe this? It is rather obvious that the interest for children shown by Mr “Santa” is a dubious one. He is concerned of being payed back in the most awkward way. Be careful when looking at all the fake Santas smiling at the small children. Isn’t it enough with the scandal in the Catholic Church? We suggest that you take a look at our original. Small, ugly, shy, rather unpleasant, but not dangerous for children; normally he doesn’t bite. We wish you welcome to Hartmanburg Ladonia.

Is Christmas a Misunderstanding?

The Day of Misunderstanding is on the 24 _ of December. But this might, or might not, be a misunderstanding. It could also mean that the Christmas is a misunderstanding. Still the possibility of Christmas will be present in Ladonia (though only theoretical, you need a wormhole or something the like) as the officials have announced Christmas celebration to be finished latest on December 13th. But there are more interesting days at this time of year. The 25 _ is the Second Day of Misunderstanding, bringing even more question marks together about what is going on. And then the relief on the 26th when it is Stealing Day. That day everyone is occupied in stealing from each other. This day is a great project of scientific value as we could achieve that after a tremendous stealing time everything had returned to what it was when we started, an absolute symmetry.

Portugal

A special welcome to our new citizens from Portugal! Around 100 new citizens have brought Portugal to the 7th place among those country contributing to Ladonia. 250 of our citizens are now living in Portugal. In all we are now 10 200.

The Ministry of Underwater Relations

This is a must, visit the website of our Argentine minister Pablo Linares:

HTTP://LADONIA.AYMNET.COM

Pascale – Dame Watercolour

The minister of lost time, Pascale, has made several and highly qualified contributions to Ladonia, especially in the field of watercolour. Look at the passports for Ladonian minister and the promising calendar for the next year.
... is the new 2003 calendar:
http://mapage.noos.fr/lomoandco/

Ximena

Ximena Mariela Florido Soria from La Paz is Ministro de galletas con chispas de chocolate, or Minister of Cookies with Chocolate Sparks. It is astonishing that nobody has thought about these cookies before. Now we all can sleep better as we know they are in good hands.

The Monster Nimis

Monster Nimis moving around in the world

Successful experiments by Minister James Hartman have given us the movable “Monster Nimis”, that is a construction generated from the original sculpture. It is not possible to predict where it will go. Just keep looking. It left Indiana, USA, in the end of July this year. Rather low speed, around 2 km/h, but it never stops. It can be anywhere. Please look for it. We are very interested in knowing where it is and what it is doing.

And do not forget to visit the homepage of Minister Hartman (who is related to Charlemagne) – you can find picture of Hartmanburg /south of Nimis/ - and also look for the small white horse, rearing:

http://futurescience.homestead.com/knighthood.html

Ladonian Architecture

Amalgamating architecture

A Piece of Good Ecology and Economy

Sock with hole

How to save the world and money: If you have a hole in your sock, mend it with newspaper. You will just need one sheet every time you use this sock. Just cover the hole with the sheet of paper. As you are able to exchange the sheet you will be able to use one particular sock (or two) for the rest of your life. If you have an ordinary newspaper it will last for around one week. A frequent question is whether you can use this method at solemn occasions, like, for instance, the Nobel banquet. Yes, you can, as long as you do not step out of your shoes.

The Ladonian Pi

The solution of the Ladonian Pi (Ladonian Mathematics) has been made by Carlos André, minister of the dark side:

Ip should be…..95141,3 a number without beginning.

It has been made official through a decision in the cabinet.

The Beginning and Observation

Laird Glenalmond has presented us these interesting figures as a contribution to the open Ministry of Beginning and Observation.

The following data set was registered when trying to observe the beginning:

TIME ANGLE theta
00:42 20.64 0,000645
03:03 19.42 0,000601
05:54 17.77 0,000543
07:29 - 0,000356
09:32 17.77 (!) 0,000456
11:56 18.29 0,000666
14:03 20.13 0,000697
16:14 20.54 0,000782
BAD LIGHT STOPPED PLAY

Is this a singularity?

The Truth of 1 + 1 = 2

You have seen it before. We have 0; that is nothing, the empty set of things. Then we have 1 which is the number of sets that is empty (like moons made of green cheese etc.) And thus the number of elements in the previous sets (0 and 1). You could argue that we then have 0 + 1 = 2, but in this case zero is an element; 1 + 1 = 2. But it is too simple, we will never meet this but in theory. For practical reasons we need a more realistic way of presenting the base of everything. Our minister of coincidence and destiny, Milos Surgos has made the job:

everybody knows that>

1= ln(e)

and

1= sin2 (p) + cos2 (p)

and

2=Â (1/2)n

it means that 1+1=2 we can write as

ln(e) + sin2 (p) + cos2 (p) = Â (1/2)n

it doesn't look so simple anymore, does it? :-)

but we also know

1 = cosh (q) . ÷(1-tanh2(q))

and

e = lim (1+1/z)2

the final result => 1+1=2 we can write as

ln (lim (1+1/z)2) + sin2 (p) + cos2 (p) = Â{ [cosh (q) . ÷(1-tanh2(q))] / 2} n

Now, it looks like taken from the real life.

The Beer Christmas Song

A collaboration between Minister Pavel Golubkov (Beer) and Minister James Hartman (Future Science) has given us this song:

I'M DREAMING OF A GREEN PENGUIN*

I'm Dreaming of a green Penguin, the kind I have never
known, with Green Ladonian Beer flowing, young women
at the bar tossing, the Thraw-thing foam beer
against my nose.

And smell of salted fish is floating
and smoke of cigarette is curling
Where are you my green Penguin,
The Cristmas boring without you.

* Most Ladonians are penguins living in Antarctic

The Poet from India

Mr Shyam is a Ladonian poet from INDIA. His latest contribution in the poetical field is a poem about his country:

LAND LADONIA
A piece of land ladonia-
flying higher than high,
Far than ever as-
our flying embassy-
with holding mark a-
green cross flag of green,
Wotan city capital of country,
Holding hands each other-
as a strong chain-
with few of members,
A huge pond of water-
throwing a stone into the water,
Never break our unity-
with any power of ever.

Haridas Shyamkumar.

AT THE END OF THE DAY

Yours forever, Emanuel von Bock, Minister of Health

Emanuel von Bock, Minister of Health in Ladonia

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Lars Vilks, Secretary of State of Ladonia

Lars Vilks
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Created: 2002-12-23