59th issue, February 2003
EDITORIAL
“In the Winter of '02, I was struck (about the head and shoulders by my co-workers, but that is another story) with a jolt of inspiration concerning Ladonia's need for a Slightly Longer National Anthem (ie. one that lasts longer than a one-second splash). Surely some occasions of state and the Royal Court, where the varied and complex business, pomp and circumstance of the Nation are conducted, require official music to grease the wheels of progress.
Also, as Sec. Vilks has pointed out, sometimes it is too damn cold to continually go outside and throw another stone into the water as each elaborate point of royal protocol unwinds.
It was with these intentions that I, in a trance state induced by Metaxa, composed and recorded a S.L.N.A. (Slightly Longer National Anthem) for Ladonia entitled "Ladonia: For Thee I Fling." In the piece I sought to capture the elusive effluvium that comprises the majesty of the Ladonian spirit.
Several Forbidden Instruments were dusted off and employed in the recording of the SLNA, but I cannot speak of it further. Suffice to say that, as others in the Ladonian Cabinet and Royal Family find themselves in need of original music for the next event in Ladonia's Bold March to the Future, please contact me and I will buy another bottle of 7-Star and get to work.
digitum meum trahe
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I am honored to be among such august company, and look forward to helping you steer the ship of state in directions both enigmatic and obscure. I am here to meet your musical needs.
I have included (below) the lyrics to "Ladonia: For Thee I Fling", and hope that at some point the song will be hear-able on the Ladonia website, so that the world will have an audio template within which to contemplate the portentous implications of the Ladonian Phenomenon.
Waaaaallllll!
Walter Ehresman, Austin, Texas, Minister of Dubious Anthems
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Ladonia–For Thee I Fling (The Slightly Longer National Anthem of Ladonia) (© 2002 Walter Ehresman)
Waaaall!
My spleen yearns for Wotan City;
My spleen yearns for Wotan City;
Omfalos esta kaput;
Nimis, Arx endure!
My liver calls to Wotan City;
My liver calls to Wotan City;
Omfalos esta kaput;
Nimis, Arx endure!
Omfalos.....
No oertug at the center of the world;
Omfalos.....
The aspiring man is one of our Nobles and in fact a very good friend of mine. He is at the moment living/working in North England, american from birth and otherwise living in Sweden (with his swedish wife and 4 kids - and yes, I suspect that he very sublimely is trying to overtake Sweden by multiplying). Enough said, here is his Pope-manifest. Is he the man for the funny hat?
His manifest:
The religion of Ladonicum is relatively open and recognises the other
religions in the world in order to establish eucheminical relations.
The basic precept of the religion is in teaching "The Choice" of personal
godhood:
The Choice is broken down into the following main categories.
Sub-catagories will be placed under the Pope's review for inclusion into The
List. Only priests or cardinals of the orders of Ladonicum may submit
suggestions in order to keep the general rabbel from turning this into a
complete farce like some other religions that could be named, but won't.
(The Pope Says,"In the name of euchemincal relations you should probably
remove that last line!".
The List of Choices
1. The vengeful/wrathful/jealous god.
2. The "I've already planned everything so why worry" preordained god.
3. The "I've created you and now it's up to you to form your own destinies"
god.
4. The "I've split myself into pieces because I was lonely and you are all
part of me" god.
5. "Created you? You must be joking you freak of nature!" evolution god.
The Pope's primary job is to be the focal point of the religion in order to
notify god as to which of the personal choices the Ladonian religous zealots
and let Him deal with them accordingly and in His own time.
Warning!
God has control of the time space continuem and has been known to cause both
natural catastrophes and spontaneous miracles. This is your only warning!
Ladonicum is the formal language of The Church, but the priesthood has been
rather lax of late and been noted to speak in the local tongues of the
congregation in which they explain The Choice. This has been strongly
discouraged by the Pope, but he has not yet issued a formal writ of warning.
 Christmas tree |
The creative Christmas for our Eternal Minister of Art & Jump Fredrik Larsson is over:
The 13th of January was "Twentyday juletide" (Tjugondedag jul) in Sweden (also called 20-day christmas, but mostly 20-day Knut since Knut has a namesday according to the swedish almanack. Knut means by the way "knot" and Knut is of course a nice old viking-name if we can belive the tales).
So, the christmas (juletide) is over now, even in the "real" world. So what can be more appropriate than to show how my Ladonian Juletide-tree looks like. I told you about this before but havent sent you a pic yet. Sorry about that!
As you can see from the pics it's littered with apples (of course) and the anthem-playing stone from the Ladonian shores are present, like the little Ladonian penguine as a topstar and guardian angel, overlooking the whole juletide. The penguine is better visible in the second picture (...03.jpg).
I wont throw this little gem of a juletide-reminder out - I don't give a shit that traditions say "out with the christmas". There is an old song saying that "juletide lasts til easter" and that sounds fine with me. And that starts me thinking about the Ladonian easter-traditions, what are those?
Best of waaalll
http://www.csel.com/ladonia and in MoUWR web : http://ladonia.aymnet.com
Angel showing itself in Indiana |
Standard Ladonian Penguins. A picture from Paulo Baptista
|
Mutant Penguin in Hartmanburg, Ladonia
|
“I would like to introduce myself and my new ministry:
The Ministry of Alchemy & Folly.
In conjunction with my new ministry I will having an
exhibition of drawings at Perfect Fools in Stockholm
opening the 6th of February until the 14th of March.
The title of my exhibition is På luffen i Karaokegruvorna.
skämtteckningar & ritningar
The address is: Kammakargatan 29
111 60 Stockholm
The exhibition will feature a number of alchemical & folly related drawings!
I will also be showing drawings at by the way gallery in Bergen Norway
opening the 13th of Februrary. The website is http://www.galleribtw.no
I hope I will be able to meet some of you when I am there!
Jo Cook”
Let's say you need to carry a lot of stuff. Let's say you'd like to carry a lot of stuff. Let's also say that you can't afford photographer/fishing vests and cargo pants! What are you going to do? Add custom pockets to your clothes with Duct Tape, of course.
On the Ministry of Duct Tape and High Voltage's photo gallery, there are two new images: a customized duct tape journal pocket (for those who need to record ideas on the go) and a custom duct tape CD player sheath (for hands-free music), both attatched to my trenchcoat.
"Corruptis in Extremis,"
Hunter Tammaro
Minister of Duct Tape and High Voltage
http://www.ducttape.tk
Duct Tape Day is August 12!
Minister Hunter also has an opinion about the Iraq war:
As to the War in Iraq, Ladonia's official standpoint should be ignoring the war completely. Put that good-'ol Ladonian ingenuity to work and take your suppressed apathy out on the world. I can see it now...
Reporter: What is your opinion on the war in Iraq?
Ladonian: Meh.
After all, "investigative reporting" has humorously proved that the Iraq war is a hoax...
http://www.pointlesswasteoftime.com/iraq.html
“Personally I'm very interested in how much a war on Iraq might weigh.”
“If a brain weighs about the same as 6 onions, does this hence mean that the
juice from one onion could be a deadly weapon in the hand of a fully armed
Generalissimo?”
 James Hartman’s construction of Nimis on the Moon. It is a problem to preserve the wood of the Ladonia building Nimis. Our great plan is to move, or at least make a copy, in a place where it needs no maintenance. We will use our colony on the moon. |
Meanwhile, the design concept for LS2 is beginning to gel, but we have not yet received the go-ahead to build it (or LS1 for that matter). I observed one "yea" vote on these space stations -- has there been a tally? Also, we are still trying to determine the location of LS1, the local space station in Ladonia. Any suggestions would be most welcome.
yP,
Joshua Kaye
Minister of Mysterious Parts as well as Undisclosed and Undetermined Contents
This is the official report on the Ladonian Embassy in Arizona.
Once the position was approved, I contacted a Native American tribe
(The Supai) and was given a location and a building for the embassy.
They gave us a building in a remote location because of the view and
their respect for privacy. Before I could move into the building, a
storm came and knocked the building down. I was going to move into
the building anyway as a way of thanking them for thinking so highly
of us. They refused to let me and offered us a new location with a
fantastic view and a brand new building. (See the photos in the
embassy folder.
The new building is made out of stone and will survive any storm. The
residents of this area must practice some sort of segregation based
on gender as the new building has two doors, one is marked Men and
the other is marked Ladies. While I have not moved into the new
embassy, I have noticed that the building has a large basement that
looks like it will be great for storing things. I just can not find a
door that leads down to the basement.
The new embassy also comes with two seats. Each seat is in its own
room. I can hardly wait for the desks to arrive. The only bad thing
that I have to report about the building is that the basement seems
to emit a foul odor. I am told that the smell will fade in time and
that it comes from the rocks of the area.
Once the embassy is completely finished, I would like to host a house
warming party.
If there are any questions, I will be happy to answer them in a
timely basis.
At the End of the Day.
What is possible? All boring things. What is not possible? That which really
matters. We are all like brothers and sisters Agronauts in space, on the
craft Earth, among all those stars and galaxies, that together look like
dust along the Milky Way, experienced by all who ever at least once have
managed to escape our nearly all prevailing megawatt-light-pollution
wherever anybody decides to build if only one house - caught in a web of
that which is possible, by law of Nature, and we are stuck. Our thirsting
souls need to drink the water of what is not possible, thus buried much
deeper than we can see or imagine and abundant in an altogether unfathomable
way - at any step, possible to take, there are myriads of impossible
alternatives. Understand Ladonians, a new year has begun, and don't let
yourself be suffocated by the old. Now, however, good recipies need
generations to be formed. Your spirit belongs to the unfathomable, what is
beyond all reason, thus also what we know as possible. Let me give you an
example of a newly discovered Law of Nature!
Whenever you visit a trestaurant, order, and see how, finally, the waitor is
approaching your table, you know, stylish as need be with the plate high up
in the air, balanced on his fingertips - if then you observe a "tower" built
on that plate, you can just as well rise, put on your coat, leave some tip
at the table, and exit the place: Then you have noticed a very sure and
omnioius sign of a place using young creative cooks, whose creativity
exceeds all gooid taste, people who have studied the new and imagine
creativity is the same as at all cost combine together what has never been
tried before, in whatever way or according to whatever whim the may become
victims to. In such places there are more subtle signs too, everywhere
rather young guests - the new generatin of middle class upstart
connaisseurs, those who later in life buy themselves a seat in the local
symphony hall, because that's the thing to do if you want to be respected...
So, dear Ladonians, what is impossible, precisely you cannot perform in this
world, wrapped in the almost unperceptible web of all what is possible, by
law, from all corners impinging on us brothers and sisters Arronauts in
space, among all those bright gems forming constellations and all that
silvery dust which inhabits immense black silent space beyond.
Happy New Year, Ye Ladonians as well as All Peoples in the World.
Dr Emanuel von Bock
Emanuel von Bock, Minister of Health in Ladonia
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Vera Porad Falk, Executive Editor
Lars Vilks, Secretary of State of Ladonia
Lars Vilks
Box 1
S-260 43 Arild
Sweden
© Copyright 1996 - 2003 Lars Vilks, Vera Porad Falk and Arrive Inter Media
Created: 2003-02-10