New Herald

January 31, 2009

31st of January

Filed under: Events in Ladonia, Science — Lars Vilks @ 9:54 pm

The 31st of January is celebrated in Ladonia as the Day of the Winter’s Greatest Depth. It was though not too much winter this year, temperature + 1 degree Celsius.

But on this day it has been made possible to move Omfalos back at its original place. Omfalos was stolen and brought away by the Swedes in 2001. The Minister of Future, James Hartman, has with good result developed teleportation and made it possible to, at least temporarily, bring back the Omfalos monument.

Omfalos is coming back through teleportation.

Watch HERE

January 28, 2009

New Minister in Russia

Filed under: Ladonia state affairs, The Ministers — Lars Vilks @ 7:19 pm

A new minister has been appointed by the cabinet. Timur Voronkov has become Minister of Telecommunications and Telepathy

Mr Voronkov is stationed in Norilsk in Siberia.

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Timur Voronkov, new minister in Ladonia

January 27, 2009

Teleportation

Filed under: Science, The Ministers — Lars Vilks @ 2:40 pm

As most of the Ladonia citizens live far away from their homeland the Minister of Future Science Jamens Hartman is developing a new method of teleportation. He is very close to make this work and we will soon see the first citizen visit Ladonia with this travel method.

Here is a video showing a successful experiment made by the minister when he makes a teleportation of himself.

VIDEO

January 23, 2009

Admiral Pedro’s security problems

Filed under: The Ministers — Lars Vilks @ 1:51 pm

Our minister and admiral Pedro is here telling his story about security:

“A photographic camera can also be a very agressive object. Specially if used against a head of a security officer. I explained that to security officers in the Rotterdam airport a few years back. They almost arrested me (2002), they did not appreciate my sense of humor. Especially because inside the pouch where the photographic camera there was a little knife multitool swiss made Victorinox purchased at Logan airport Boston. And my wife in her bag she had the mini Swiss pocket knife she used for her nails.

The knifes were not confiscated. They did not arrest me because I was travelling with my familly. However they told me to get rid of the knifes in some way. So I had to throw inde a trash of the airport the knifes, which made the security officers mad at me because they did not know which trash I thrown them away. And now they had to find them, just in case something happened…

When the security officers asked me if I had another weapon, for example a pistol, my younger son (4 years old)replied to the officer that “YES my daddy he has a BIG one at home”!!! At that moment several officers put their hand on their guns, and there was a silence. You can imagine the embarrasment! I looked at my kid and couldn’t believe the situation. So the officers were looking at me in a very very suspicious way with the hand on the guns. They sent an officer in the plane with us who was constantly looking at me. The officer followed us during the holiday and I met in in several places, the hotel, the beach, the restaurant, ect…. I welcomed him warmly with a “f**k yah”!

After that incident with the security at Rotterdam, I was followed constantly when I came back to Rotterdam by police officers in civilian clothing. They even entered one my office and sat on my desk, no kidding. The most annoying part was to be followed by them when I was taking my kids to school. They even randomly stopped me to check my pockets and bag and see if I had a knife or the famous pistol.

Well this was quite unfortunate, because at that time, I was living in Rotterdam Center (old town) and we were one of the few non muslims families there, that might have made me more suspicious. So this made my life quite complicated for a time, having a shadow following me and trying to stop me from time to time. I became an expert fleeing them and at a certain point the only worlds I had for them was “f**k yah” :D.

One day I was was with 3 officers in civilian clothing in the lift of my offices and situations like that.

The other interesting thing that happened was that one day, a bunch of police officers in civilian clothing came to my office, faking they were doing a TV documentary (no kidding they brought cameras!!!!), again no kidding. I recognized part of the officers of the airport. That was too much for me. They even told the Human Resources manager they wanted to interview me. Guess who it was who wanted to interview me? The one of the photographic camera!!! :D

One day it all stopped. I think they realized that I was not involved in anything dangerous.

But see how a small incident can make so much trouble.

Adm. Pedro”

January 20, 2009

New Coach for Ladonia National Soccer Team

Filed under: Sport — Lars Vilks @ 7:54 pm

Lord Lars Semb Maalen-Johansen is new coach for Ladonia National Team. It is very difficult to play in Ladonia because of its stone filled ground the matches will be played in Norway. The whole nation is expecting good results from our Lord coach. And we wish him luck!

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Lord Lars Semb Maalen-Johansen inspecting the Ladonia arena.

January 19, 2009

Ladonia original population

Filed under: University & Education, Science — Lars Vilks @ 8:34 pm

The older Ladonia, before the country became free in 1996, has had a population. We know quite a lot about this, especially from the tradition around King Ladon. But traces of a more primitive population has been found on several occasions. A rare film shows a glimpse of these people. The film was shot in 1981. It could very well be that they still are around.

Watch the unique film on YouTube.

January 12, 2009

Cabinet decide on Ladonia action in Gaza

Filed under: Ladonia state affairs, Breaking News — Lars Vilks @ 12:52 pm

The war in Gaza has been the concern of Ladonia cabinet. The government has decided to send our navy and, if necessary, disarm (which probably will be necessary) Hamas and Israel.

President:
“Civilian clothes = civilian (check for terrorists).
Military uniform = Military (remove uniform, military personnel is prohibited).

When suspecting paramilitary clothing = Check if terrorist, otherwise remove paramilitary clothing, paramilitary personnel is prohibited).”

Minister Taru:
“disarm both Israeli army and all Palestine
militias and deploy Ladonian army and navy to protect peace and
security of people from all ethnic and religious groups there. We
should train our pygmy elephant troops to detect explosives: with
their superior sense of smell we could easily discover terrorist
groups before they act.”

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The pygmy elephant monument in Ladonia
(Photo: James Hartman)

January 5, 2009

Take a January trip to Ladonia

Filed under: Nimis, General information — Lars Vilks @ 7:34 pm

A frozen day in Ladonia on Twelfth Night: Take the trip on YouTube.

January 1, 2009

New Year and New Ambassador

Filed under: Ladonia state affairs — Lars Vilks @ 9:25 pm

The number of citizens of Ladonia is, on the 1st of January 2009: 14.139

Today Ladonia can also announce a new ambassador, Rangel Koldanov from Bulgaria. He lives in the ancient city of Montana in the Northwest of Bulgaria. We wish the ambassador welcome and luck with his important task. 102 of the citizens of Ladonia live in Bulgaria.

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The ambassador Rangel Koldanov, Bulgaria

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